When the crutch gets kicked out from under you

We've all had those little crutches.  Those things that keep us going when times are tough, whether it be our particular pumpkin spice latte in the fall, or our mother's pound cake, that favorite bookmark, or just a pair of earrings that make us feel happy.

What happens, then, when the shop stops carrying that latte, when mom suddenly can't make her pound cake and you didn't think to get the recipe, you lose the bookmark or the earrings are stolen?

The world looks dark, very dark and we feel devastated.  For a while.  Then most of us pick up the pieces and go on, or at least, I hope we do.

I had a caller today at work.  This lady was looking for a referral to an attorney because her cell phone provider had required reset and re-recording of the customers' voice mail boxes.  In the process of this upgrade, change, whatever they were doing, they had deleted her husband's and mother's voice mail boxes and the greetings could not be retrieved.

This was a problem, a major problem for this lady, because the husband died two years ago and her mother, a year ago.  She was distraught.  She had paid their cell phone bills and kept the phones for the sole and express purpose of preserving those voice mail greetings.

She did not specifically say, but I gather that she took comfort in dialing the phone and listening to the greeting.  After she was notified by the cell phone provider, she also got conflicting information from them as to the ability to retrieve the greetings.  She was first told yes, then no, then yes, but realized to her dismay that they were indeed gone forever.   She wanted to sue.

Sometimes folks laugh or gripe about people wanting to sue.  We say "oh, everybody wants an easy ride.  They think they can get easy money."  I used to say this, a lot.  But I can count on the fingers of one hand the folks I've talked to in the last four years who I think had this attitude.

No, for the most part, people are upset, they are grieving, they are hurting, and they want it fixed, the scales tilted back or at least evened out, and someone to pay for the hurt they caused.  For them, money isn't the point.

It just doesn't always work that way.  I directed the lady to the state consumer affairs division in hopes that they might be able to clarify for her that, as I suspect, no consumer law has been breached.  The cell phone company likely owns those digital recordings that they casually deleted, and she has no legal recourse.

Her crutch is gone and she'll never get it back.  I feel terrible for her and my heart has been heavy about it for hours now.  I will remember her in my prayers tonight, tomorrow, and hopefully for some time to come.  I hope she finds peace and closure in some way.

It's a really good reminder to me that we need to be careful of the crutches we choose, and we need to be careful how much weight we put on them.  It's my personal belief that there's only one crutch that's adequate for all life's troubles, and that's God.  Anything else can be discontinued, lost, stolen, or casually discarded by someone who doesn't know what it is.  We can't store up any treasures on earth, and certainly none that will keep us here or bring our loved ones back.  By all means, save those videos, save those movies, treasure those memories.  But when all those are gone, we can still have the peace that surpasses all understanding - if we are using the right crutch.